Excerpts from Swan Lake by Peter Cameron
"Excerpts from Swan Lake" by Peter Cameron is a narrative that explores themes of memory, identity, and interpersonal relationships through the lens of a family dynamic in suburban Connecticut. The story follows Paul and his partner, Neal, as they temporarily care for Paul's grandmother, Mrs. Andrews, while his parents are away. Their domestic routine is interrupted by a visit from a Meals on Wheels representative, which highlights the contrasts between their modern life and the expectations of traditional roles.
Mrs. Andrews struggles with her memory, recalling vivid sensations from her past while grappling with forgetfulness about more immediate concerns. This theme of selective memory mirrors Paul’s own experiences, as he is caught between sensory pleasure and deeper emotional issues, particularly regarding his relationship with Neal. The tension in their home escalates as Neal expresses discomfort with their living situation and the lack of recognition of their relationship by Paul’s family.
The narrative culminates in a trip to a ballet performance of "Swan Lake," which serves as a poignant backdrop for Paul’s introspection about his relationship with Neal and his own struggles with self-identity. The story highlights not only the beauty of connection and memory but also the complexities of love and acceptance in a world that often overlooks non-traditional relationships.
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Excerpts from Swan Lake by Peter Cameron
First published: 1985
Type of plot: Psychological
Time of work: A summer during the 1980's
Locale: Cheshire, Connecticut, and New York City
Principal Characters:
Paul Andrews , the young narrator and protagonistNeal , his loverMrs. Andrews , his grandmother
The Story
Paul and his lover Neal prepare dinner for Paul's grandmother in the suburban Connecticut home of Paul's parents. Paul and Neal have moved out of their New York apartment for the summer in order to take care of Mrs. Andrews while Paul's parents cruise around the world. They are interrupted in their work by a visit from a representative from Meals on Wheels—a woman whom Paul calls "Gloria Marsupial" because of his uncertainty about how to pronounce her name. The social services volunteer is disconcerted when Paul answers the door wielding a knife and when she sees the bare-chested, lacto-vegetarian Neal stirring mushroom curry in a wok. In order to make space in the refrigerator for the tray of meat loaf, green beans, and pudding that she has brought for Mrs. Andrews, she pushes aside the men's beer.
The Marsupial woman asks if Mrs. Andrews wants her blood pressure taken, but Paul's grandmother is more concerned about her unreliable memory. Her recollections are very selective. She can no longer identify lilacs and does not remember how many times she has been married, but she can vividly recall one girlhood summer that she spent on a farm. Her memories are triggered by such sensuous details as the sheer physical exuberance of running and the sight of a single mulberry blown into her bowl of mashed potatoes.
In this regard, Mrs. Andrews and Paul are alike. He, too, is engaged more by sensation than by interpretation, more by present experience than by conjecture over the past and the future. Paul is intoxicated by the combined redolence of curry and lilacs; he is made "dizzy" by smoking an occasional cigarette.
Below the surface of domestic routine, however, disharmony lurks. After Mrs. Andrews retires to her bedroom and Paul and his lover are left to rewash the dishes that she has imperfectly cleaned, Neal announces his intention of returning to their apartment in the city. Uncomfortable in this suburban home, he points to the predictable African violets on the windowsill to emphasize his sense of displacement. He is also unable to relax at night when he considers the possibility of the grandmother's confronting both men in bed. No one in the family, it seems, comprehends the true nature of their relationship.
A week after Neal returns to the city, Paul and his grandmother see a television commercial for a coming production of the ballet Swan Lake. Because of his grandmother's interest in ballet and her assertion that she has never been to a live performance, Paul purchases three tickets to commemorate her eighty-eighth birthday. Neal drives up from the city to attend the birthday dinner. Afterward, as he puts ice-cream cake back into the freezer, he expresses his fondness for Paul's grandmother and his wish that she knew that Paul and he are lovers.
Later, at the theater, Neal leaves during intermission, still bothered by Paul's apparent inability to see a problem in his refusal publicly to acknowledge his sexual orientation and their relationship. Meanwhile, Mrs. Andrews falls asleep in her seat. The story ends with Paul left to himself. Unamused by the dancing on stage, he is painfully conscious of the contrast between the grace and surety of Prince Siegfried and the Swan Queen and his own clumsiness in matters of the heart.