First, Body by Melanie Rae Thon
"First, Body" by Melanie Rae Thon is a poignant narrative that explores themes of compassion, suffering, and the complexities of human connection through the experiences of Sid Elliott, an emergency-room attendant. Set against a backdrop where the American Dream feels unattainable, the story unfolds as Sid navigates his own struggles while attempting to support others, particularly Roxanne, a woman grappling with substance abuse issues. Their relationship reveals the deep scars both characters carry—Roxanne from her tumultuous past with addiction, and Sid, haunted by unspecified wartime trauma.
As Sid reaches out to Roxanne, hoping to provide solace, he faces repeated disappointments as she relapses back into alcohol and life on the streets. The narrative also examines Sid’s interactions with the deceased, particularly Gloria Luby, a woman whose life was marred by addiction, reflecting on societal neglect of vulnerable individuals. Sid's desire to treat Gloria with dignity culminates in a painful moment that leaves him physically disabled, underscoring the fragility of life and the weight of human connection.
Through Sid’s journey, "First, Body" emphasizes the importance of understanding and empathy in a harsh world, while highlighting the often-unseen struggles of those living at the margins of society. The story ultimately presents a meditation on love, loss, and the challenges of truly connecting with others amidst personal demons and societal indifference.
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First, Body by Melanie Rae Thon
First published: 1995
Type of plot: Psychological
Time of work: The 1990's
Locale: Seattle, Washington
Principal Characters:
Sid Elliott , a war veteran who works first in the emergency room then in the morgue of a hospitalRoxanne , his girlfriendGloria Luby , a corpse
The Story
"First, Body" portrays people for whom the American Dream is merely a phrase. The events are seen through the eyes of Sid Elliott, who, although struggling to find his own way, still reaches out to others.
In a city park, Sid, an emergency-room attendant of eight months, encounters Roxanne, a forty-nine-year-old woman who has stopped using heroin but still abuses alcohol. Sid no longer drinks but smokes marijuana. Roxanne goes with him to his home, a one-room loft in a warehouse, where she remains a number of months.
Both have suffered physically and psychologically. Roxanne started drinking at age nine, acquired a drug habit, and left her daughter because "it got too hard, dragging the kid around." Sid, big and clumsy as a child and as an adult, is psychologically scarred by a war, unnamed but clearly Vietnam. Mostly what he wants from Roxanne is for her to stay. Roxanne, in an expression of support for him, quits drinking but smokes more cigarettes, several packs a day. After two months together and thirty-nine days of abstinence from alcohol, she returns to whiskey and to life on the streets. She comes back beaten up, and Sid is there to offer her comfort, food, and cigarettes, but it is not enough, and she leaves again. He imagines her in the street people he meets: The man who sifts through the trash for food, the fifteen-year-old prostitute, and the woman whose bloated body was retrieved from the river.
After being criticized for dropping a sterilized tray of equipment when he prevented a patient from hitting her head against the wall, Sid is transferred to the morgue. There he knows he cannot think of the bodies as female, a hint that perhaps Sid has a problem with determining what is appropriate behavior toward girls and women. His sister earlier asked that he stay away from her three daughters whose slightness and quickness frightened him; his father asked that he move out of the family home because he "touched his mother too often and in the wrong way."
In the final section Sid wants to recognize the humanity in the deceased Gloria Luby, an obese woman who is brought to the morgue for a postmortem. Gloria, a street person, destroyed her body with alcohol. To receive hospital care while she was alive, she agreed to an autopsy. Even though she outweighs him by almost ninety pounds, Sid decides to lift her instead of rolling her as the doctor suggested. He wants to do it alone because another orderly might ridicule her. He will be "the last person alive who will touch her with tenderness." However, her 326 pounds prove too much. As Sid lifts her to transfer her from the gurney to the table, the tendons in his knee tear, and he collapses underneath her. He crawls away leaving her face down on the floor. His knee is permanently damaged, and the prognosis is that he will spend time in a wheelchair and then with a walker, but he should eventually, with luck, be able to walk with a cane.
In his hospital room, Sid, in a Demerol-induced haze, imagines he sees Roxanne, who laughs at his attempt to give Gloria some dignity, and his father, who thinks what a waste it is for Sid to have survived the war only to be disabled by a fat woman. He sees Gloria, who, offering warmth, lies down next to him, then the young street prostitute who hands him a cigarette, and for a second time, Roxanne, who presses the button that releases the pain-reducing drug. The story concludes with Sid knowing the importance of love and understanding the risks involved.