Frog Dances by Stephen Dixon
"Frog Dances" by Stephen Dixon explores the journey of Howard, a writer and college teacher, who becomes captivated by a fleeting moment he witnesses in New York City: a man dancing with his baby to a Mahler symphony. This poignant scene inspires Howard to pursue a life of marriage and fatherhood. His quest leads him through a series of romantic encounters with various women, each relationship revealing his struggles with intimacy, compatibility, and the societal expectations of love.
As Howard navigates the complexities of dating, he grapples with both his desires and insecurities, often reflecting on his idealized vision of family life. Throughout his experiences, he encounters differing perspectives on love and relationships, ultimately leading him to Denise, a woman he initially doubts but later sees in a new light. The narrative concludes with Howard realizing his dream as he dances with his own child, fulfilling the emotional aspiration that sparked his journey. The story poignantly highlights themes of love, self-discovery, and the pursuit of personal fulfillment against the backdrop of modern relationships.
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Frog Dances by Stephen Dixon
First published: 1986
Type of plot: Psychological
Time of work: The 1960's to 1980's
Locale: New York City
Principal Characters:
Howard Tetch , a fiction writer and college teacher in search of the perfect wifeDenise , his eventual wifeFlora Selenika , a college student with whom he has a short affairFrancine , a lawyer whom he dates
The Story
Howard Tetch, a writer and college teacher of writing, is walking down a street in New York City when he accidentally looks in a window and sees a man about his age dancing around the room holding in his arms a two-or three-month-old baby. The music to which he is dancing is the slow movement of a Gustav Mahler symphony. The scene's depiction of a father's perfect moment with his child and the beauty of the paternal dance of love stirs Howard so profoundly that he feels impelled to reproduce it in his own life. Determined to reify that edenic moment in his own life, Howard sets off on a quest to make himself into a happily married husband and father.
He immediately calls three of his friends and boldly asks them to keep an eye out for any available women and, if possible, to invite him to events where he can meet them. The first woman he meets confesses that she knows that he saw a man dancing with his baby and decided that he wanted to be that man. He never calls her again. He meets a second woman at a party; they go to dinner, have sex, and decide not to see each other again because she is dating several men and does not want to tie herself down to any one man. Howard next sees a woman in line for a movie, engages her in conversation, and begins an affair with her. His irksome little habits, such as hanging his underpants to dry out in her bathroom and his refusal to shave before they go to bed, finally make the relationship an impossible one.
Howard next meets an attractive woman at an art show. They spend considerable time together, but she is hesitant to engage in sex with him. He explains that he cares deeply for her but for him love and sex are synonymous. When she refuses to go to bed with him, he finally ends the relationship. After he is invited to another university to read a colleague's students' creative work, he meets and becomes obsessed with a sexually attractive young woman, Flora Selenika, a student he was specifically advised to avoid by his host. After a drunken affair that he barely remembers, he thinks he has fallen in love with her. She insists that their relationship can never work: "No, everything's too split apart. Not only where we live but the age and cultural differences. You're as nice as they come—sweet, smart and silly—but what you want for us is unattainable."
Crestfallen, Howard decides to look for a woman more his own age and meets Denise at a picnic. Although he finds her intelligent and sensitive, he worries that her hips are too wide and will widen with age, and her teeth are not perfect. After dating Francine, a yuppie lawyer who has poor taste in art, furniture, and just about everything else, he calls Denise after having had too many drinks. She firmly suggests that he call her when he is sober. He then considers visiting a whorehouse, but the recurring image of the happy father dancing with his baby persists in his memory to remind him of his quest for the perfect mate. He rejects the idea of paying for sex and calls Denise again. He sees her anew—her hips are fine and her teeth are straight enough. He also begins to see how intelligent she is—almost too intelligent, but he rejects such self-defeating, perfectionist thoughts. After a normal courting process, they marry and she has a baby. The story concludes happily with Howard dancing around a room with his baby to the last movement of Jean Sibelius's Fifth Symphony. He realizes that he has reified that luminous scene from two years earlier that set him on his adventure to find a mate and become that happy, contented father.