Some of Us Had Been Threatening Our Friend Colby by Donald Barthelme

First published: 1973

Type of plot: Absurdist

Time of work: About 1973

Locale: The United States

Principal Characters:

  • Colby Williams, the protagonist, who has committed an unspecified crime
  • His friends, who have decided to punish him

The Story

The story concerns the punishment of Colby Williams by his friends. Colby, it seems, has "gone too far"—when, how, and at what, the reader is not told. He readily admits that he has done this, claiming, however, that "going too far . . . was something everybody did sometimes." His friends, an anonymous, all-male group, are unswayed by his reasoning and remain firm in their benevolent conviction that as his "dear friends" they have an obligation to punish him for his transgression by hanging him.

The hanging itself will be the climax of a gala social affair, and the bulk of the story centers on the arrangements that have to be made. Luckily, Colby's friends are a cosmopolitan, multitalented group. They count among their ranks a conductor, an architect, people knowledgeable about printing and about the history of executions, environmental activists, and the owner of a car-and-truck rental business. Everyone's talents are called on and everyone's opinions are consulted, even Colby's. The group is committed to bringing off the affair with éclat, and much of their discussion turns on setting the correctly festive tone for the event and making sure the day will be a success.

Colby shows his tendency to "go too far" when, graciously consulted about his preference for music for the occasion, he suggests Charles Ives's Fourth Symphony, a gargantuan work that would "put [the friends] way over the music budget." Disagreement about this choice threatens to disrupt the arrangements until Colby is sternly admonished to "be reasonable" and "think of something a little less exacting." Once the question of the music is solved, the friends discuss the appearance and wording of the invitations. They dismiss some slight qualms about the illegality of the proceedings by claiming that "we had a perfect moral right [to hang Colby] because he was our friend, belonged to us in various important senses, and he had after all gone too far." Referring to the hanging ambiguously as "An Event Involving Mr. Colby Williams," they determine, will help them to evade unwelcome attention from the law. They decide to serve drinks and magnanimously assure Colby that he can drink, too, before the finale.

The mechanics of the hanging are a more complicated matter, but the friends pool their knowledge to overcome their lack of experience with such things. In a debate between building a gibbet or using a tree, they choose a tree for reasons of ease, economy, and most important, aesthetics—this will be a "June hanging," and the full-leafed tree will "add a kind of 'natural' feeling." Aesthetic and environmental considerations lead the friends to dismiss the idea of a hangman or a firing squad (the latter is Colby's suggestion, his last attempt at "going too far," prudently rejected by Howard as an "ego trip" and as "unnecessary theatrics"). Instead, they decide, the guest of honor will jump off a large rubber ball considerately painted a deep green to blend in with the surroundings. For the noose, rope is selected over wire, for although the latter would be "more efficient," it "would injure the tree."

The friends' scrupulous planning pays off, for at the end the reader is told that "everything went off very smoothly." Not only is the event a social success ("a 'bang-up' production right down to the wire"), but also, perhaps most important, it succeeds in its punitive aim, for "nobody has ever gone too far again."

Bibliography

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Gordon, Lois. Donald Barthelme. Boston: Twayne, 1981.

Hudgens, Michael Thomas. Donald Barthelme: Postmodernist American Writer. Lewiston, N.Y.: Edwin Mellen Press, 2001.

Klinkowitz, Jerome. Donald Barthelme: An Exhibition. Durham, N.C.: Duke University Press, 1991.

McCaffery, Larry. The Metafictional Muse: The Works of Robert Coover, Donald Barthelme, and William H. Gass. Pittsburgh: University of Pittsburgh Press, 1982.

Molesworth, Charles. Donald Barthelme's Fiction: The Ironist Saved from Drowning. Columbia: University of Missouri Press, 1982.

Olsen, Lance, ed. Review of Contemporary Fiction 11 (Summer, 1991).

Patteson, Richard F., ed. Critical Essays on Donald Barthelme. New York: G. K. Hall, 1992.

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Waxman, Robert. "Apollo and Dionysus: Donald Barthelme's Dance of Life." Studies in Short Fiction 33 (Spring, 1996): 229-243.