Free-range parenting

Free-range parenting is a style of parenting in which parents or guardians give their children more control and decision-making opportunities. The free-range parenting movement encourages children’s independence by giving them the freedom to make their own decisions. For example, parents can allow children to walk home from school, take public transit on their own, or even stay home by themselves.

The movement has grown in popularity since the mid-2000s, and the state of Utah even passed a law on the subject in 2018 that protects free-range parents from prosecution. Proponents of the movement say it allows children a chance to become independent freethinkers and develop skills that will help them into adulthood without the burdens of being watched over at every moment. The movement is not without controversy, however, with critics claiming it is dangerous and unnecessarily puts kids in risky situations in which they could be hurt or abducted.

Background

The modern free-parenting movement began in the mid-2000s, but the ideas behind the movement can be traced back even further. Modern free-range parents, who grew up in the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s, remember a time when it was normal to walk to and from school alone or run unsupervised errands for their parents. For many kids growing up at that time, it was common to go out to play after school in a neighborhood park, for example, and not be expected to return home until the streetlights came on. As more families had both parents working outside the home, however, especially those who had both parents working full-time and therefore were not home as early, child care, supervised afterschool programs, and organized sports became more necessary. This shift resulted in a change in parenting styles and a culture that required children to be under near-constant adult supervision.

In 2008, one mother’s column challenged that notion, and the free-range parenting movement was born. Lenore Skenazy, a New York City resident, wrote about how she let her then nine-year-old son ride the subway by himself. He had been asking her and her husband to allow him to use the subway to find his way home on his own, and after some discussion, they decided to let him try. Skenazy gave her son a map, a Metrocard, twenty dollars, and some quarters—in case he needed to use a pay phone—and let him go. She said her son arrived home about forty-five minutes later. She wrote about the experience and quickly received backlash, even getting dubbed “America’s Worst Mom,” with many critics saying she deliberately put her son in harm’s way. The column quickly drew attention from other media outlets, and she appeared on several television news programs.

Skenazy soon wrote a book, Free Range Kids (2009), and started a blog to explain her parenting choices. The blog became a platform for the modern free-range parenting movement, allowing other parents to gain information on the subject and share feedback and experiences. She also went on to cofound the nonprofit Let Grow to advocate for new laws and educate parents and schools about childhood independence.

Overview

All parents want to raise their children to be happy, healthy, and successful adults. Free-range parents believe the best way to achieve that goal is to teach their children independence and responsibility early and often. Critics of the movement say that the free-range mentality is putting children at an unnecessary risk. They fear children walking the streets alone could be hurt or, worse, even abducted.

Crime statistics, however, pointed to crime victimization being less likely for children in the twenty-first century than it was when their parents were growing up in the 1970s and 1980s. Crime has fallen over time, but thanks to twenty-four-hour news cycles, the internet, and social media, news of crimes has increased, leading many to believe crime has as well.

Often, well-meaning strangers will call police when they see children out alone, and this can lead to trouble or even charges for parents. One free-range parenting couple in Maryland, Danielle and Alexander Meitiv, found this out the hard way when they let their ten-year-old and six-year-old walk a mile home from a park. In December 2014, the two Meitiv children were walking home when a stranger spotted them and called the police, who picked up the children to take them home, also calling Child Protective Services. The same thing happened again in April 2015, only that time police and Child Protective Services took custody of the children for more than five hours. In both incidents, neglect investigations were opened against the Meitivs, but both cases were ultimately closed and no neglect was found. Danielle Meitiv told the Washington Post she believes the world is safer than when she was a child and she wants to give her children freedom and independence to gain confidence and the ability to achieve on their own.

Similarly, after an Arizona woman pleaded guilty on charges of neglect for having left her seven-year-old son and a friend to play at a park while she ran a half-hour errand, the state's Department of Child Safety sought unsuccessfully to add her to a registry of people unfit to work with children. The court admitted that its premise of “probable cause” in the case was based more on suspicion than statistical probability, however.

In March 2018, Utah became the first state in the nation to establish a law protecting free-range parents like the Meitivs. Utah governor Gary R. Herbert signed the bill into law after it unanimously passed both chambers of the state’s legislature. The law removed various activities that children can do without supervision from the definition of child neglect. The law does not designate a specific age at which children are allowed to do the activities. It does, however, list some of the independent actions, such as walking or biking to and from school or parks, using public transit, or remaining at home unattended. With the law in place, Utah’s child welfare agencies cannot take children away from their parents if those children are found doing those activities alone, as long as the children are adequately fed, clothed, and cared for. Free-range parents like Skenazy—the mother who started the modern free-range movement in 2008—praised Utah’s decision and encouraged other states to do the same.

Other states soon began to follow suit, as part of an emerging backlash against overprotective “helicopter parenting” and a concerted effort by Let Grow and other advocates. Arkansas, South Carolina, Nevada, Montana, and New Hampshire considered similar bills over the next several years. By the mid-2020s, several states, including Oklahoma, Texas, Colorado, Connecticut, Virginia, and Illinois, had passed their own childhood independence laws. Supporters of free-range parenting applauded the legislation for recognizing that the children of lower-income parents may be unsupervised for periods of time due to economic necessity, and that that does not necessarily constitute neglect either. Research showed that most calls to child protective services were for such actions, disproportionately affecting low-income families and families of color.

Moreover, several studies published in the early 2020s suggested that overprotectiveness has had negative impacts on children's mental health and sense of self-efficacy. Others have shown independent activity can build children's self-confidence and reduce anxiety.

In 2022, the US-based streaming service Netflix began airing the Japanese reality show Old Enough!, which features older toddlers and preschoolers running errands, and thus brought to light widely differing parenting cultures. American audiences were greatly divided in their reactions, while in Japan, it had enjoyed popularity for thirty years already. Many American viewers questioned not only the show's safety but its authenticity; however, production staff vouched for the children's safety and reporters found that Japanese children generally engage in independent activities such as walking alone to school.

Bibliography

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