People skills

People skills are the tools used during effective verbal or nonverbal interactions with other individuals (peers, colleagues, superiors, etc.) in school, work, and community settings. This includes responding appropriately to stressful, new, and conflict-based situations. Because these adaptations depend on cultural and environmental settings, individuals with the best people skills are often adept at changing their mannerisms and speech to match the expectations of new audiences and the parameters of new communities. While some scholars believe that people skills can only be acquired at a young age, others believe that individuals can work to improve their people skills; in general, experts agree that the ability to interact well with others can play a significant role in a wide variety of settings and situations. People skills can include communication skills, such as active listening; emotional intelligence, such as empathy and self-regulation; interpersonal skills, such as working on a team; and other tools, such as patience, positivity, and respect.

Background

The study of people skills emerged from psychology and the pursuit of understanding how individuals work and communicate in small and large groups. In the workplace, special attention initially turned to interpersonal skills. Books such as Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936) were written to guide individuals who wanted to improve their social standing in both their personal and professional lives through better behavior and expressions. These books focus on individuals entering new social situations, communities, and cultures. However, because these guidebooks were designed for the mass market, their authors seldom interacted with academic researchers.

Scholars also focused on emotional intelligence, which is the observation and regulation of one’s own emotions as well as the emotions of others. This concept was introduced by scholars such as Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer, who in 1990 separated emotional intelligence into three parts: observing the expression of emotion, regulating emotion, and utilizing emotion. While early scholars claimed that these skills were fixed at birth or early childhood, academics continue to investigate how individuals might improve their emotional intelligence throughout their lives.

The combination of interpersonal skills, emotional intelligence, and organizational psychology has produced a number of advice columns, books, and coaches aiming to inspire and instill people skills. These materials and professionals strive to make an individual better liked, more successful, and a productive communicator in the workplace and other environments involving human interaction. At the same time, there is no set number or list of people skills, which typically vary between cultures. What might be an acceptable display of trust or approval in one community could be considered offensive in another. Regardless, at the center of these skills is the ability to show that an individual cares about and trusts their peers or coworkers. Being able to relate to colleagues by sharing similar stories and experiences or simply acknowledging the validity of another person’s opinions is a critical element of strong people skills. Patience is also considered a valuable people skill as it is critical for establishing respect, training new employees, moving into new teams, and overcoming delays and conflicts. Being persuasive without frustrating or antagonizing the person you are trying to convince is also a critical people skill.

While the immediate effects of strong people skills—such as a calm resolution to a problem—are readily noticed, some scholars are working to prove that people skills also have long-term effects. For example, scholars are attempting to demonstrate that high emotional intelligence and strong people skills existent in childhood can be used to predict future academic success. Studies in the twenty-first century appeared to confirm a strong correlation between emotional intelligence and self-regulation in preschoolers with academic and social success later in life. Other scholars believe high emotional intelligence can result in better health, less stress, and more productivity. Multiple studies have shown that individuals with high emotional intelligence can better manage stress, are more willing to work collaboratively, and have stronger job performance rates. 

Overview

Many self-help books have been published for employees, students, and community members who wish to improve their people skills. Amongst children, the phrase "plays well with others" is often used to identify a child with strong people skills. These skills are often established in school, religious, and family settings. Children are coached on how to greet their elders and peers, and through demonstration and mimicry, they learn which phrases, body language, and behaviors to use. Similar lessons are given for essential skills such as sharing, taking turns, table manners, and conflict negotiation. Each of these lessons is culturally coded, meaning the child is learning to interact in a specific cultural, class, religious, and political setting. Those lessons might not transfer to other cultures, making it difficult for a student to move up or down the class ladder. However, despite this limitation, these lessons are important to a child’s acculturation.

Some scholars worry, however, that the contemporary use of electronic screens, such as tablets and smartphones, will have an adverse effect on a child’s development of people skills. The problem is that children learn much by observing how adults interact. For example, children might learn how to interact with people on the subway by watching their parents’ interactions. However, if the children play games on their tablets throughout the entire subway ride, they miss these critical moments of observation. For adults, a general concern exists that increased dependence upon and captivation with advanced electronic devices, particularly phones, tablets, and computers, means that people do not interact with one another as often in person as they devote more time to these devices or choose to use formats such as email or texts to communicate that lack the more personal touch. In a more digital world, people skills remain important, but these abilities may prove more challenging and less refined than in the past.

Psychologists, academics, and self-help book authors have continued to stress that strong people skills are critical to success in the workplace and community. Some corporations have invested heavily in developing their employees’ emotional intelligences, understanding that doing so will make for smoother interactions between customers and employees. However, psychologists have also warned that some people may take advantage of such abilities negatively, as those with exceptionally good people skills might be tempted to manipulate other employees or customers. According to these psychologists, individuals with exceptional people skills might use their talents to gather information from colleagues or peers and then use that information to generate gossip, rumors, or even blackmail, creating problems in the workplace and community.

Bibliography

Armstrong, Michael. Armstrong’s Handbook of Management and Leadership: Developing Effective People Skills for Better Leadership and Management. 3rd ed., Kogan Page, 2012.

Berman, Evan M., and Dira Berman. People Skills at Work. CRC, 2012.

Dåderman, Anna Maria, et al. "Leading with a Cool Head and a Warm Heart: Trait-Based Leadership Resources Linked to Task Performance, Perceived Stress, and Work Engagement." Current Psychology, vol. 42, no. 33, Nov. 2023, pp. 29559–80. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=f6h&AN=174207681&site=ehost-live. Accessed 3 Nov. 2024.

Denham, Susanne A., et al. "Preschoolers' Emotion Knowledge: Self-Regulatory Foundations, and Predictions of Early School Success." Cognition & Emotion, vol. 26, no. 4, 2012, pp. 667-679, doi:10.1080/02699931.2011.602049. Accessed 3 Nov. 2024.

Harms, Louise. Working with People: Communication Skills for Reflective Practice. 2nd ed., Oxford UP, 2015.

Jain, Samta, and Afreen S. Syed Anjuman. "Facilitating the Acquisition of Soft Skills through Training." IUP Journal of Soft Skills, vol. 7, no. 2, 2013, pp. 32–39.

Kerpen, Dave. The Art of People: 11 Simple Skills That Will Get You Everything You Want. Crown Business, 2016.

Malone, Samuel A. People Skills for Managers. Liffey, 2008.

Schütz, Jessica, and Ute Koglin. "A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis of Associations between Self-Regulation and Morality in Preschool and Elementary School Children." Current Psychology, vol. 42, no. 26, Sept. 2023, pp. 22664–96. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=f6h&AN=171807338&site=ehost-live. Accessed 3 Nov. 2024.

Smith, Jacquelyn. "The 20 People Skills You Need To Succeed At Work." Forbes, 15 Nov. 2013, www.forbes.com/sites/jacquelynsmith/2013/11/15/the-20-people-skills-you-need-to-succeed-at-work. Accessed 3 Nov. 2024.

Thompson, Neil. People Skills. 4th ed., Palgrave, 2015.

"12 People Skills to Succeed at Work." Coursera, 1 Dec. 2023, www.coursera.org/articles/people-skills. Accessed 3 Nov. 2024.

Van Edwards, Vanessa. "10 Essential People Skills You Need to Succeed." Science of People, 3 June 2024, www.scienceofpeople.com/people-skills. Accessed 3 Nov. 2024.