Family values
Family values refer to the beliefs, principles, and behaviors that are significant to individual families and communities. These values can stem from religious or secular ideologies, and they often include traits such as hard work, honesty, discipline, and respect for elders. Family values are typically transmitted across generations but can evolve over time due to changing societal norms and individual family dynamics.
The concept of family is diverse, encompassing various structures beyond the traditional nuclear family, such as extended families, blended families, and chosen families. These values shape family interactions, decision-making processes, and community relationships. While many agree on the importance of family values, there is considerable variation in what these values entail, leading to potential conflicts, especially when differing cultural or religious beliefs come into play.
Furthermore, the term "family values" can sometimes be politically charged, with public figures often using it to promote specific agendas. Individuals who diverge from established family values, sometimes referred to as "cycle breakers," may seek to instill different principles in their children to avoid negative experiences associated with the values of previous generations. Understanding family values requires sensitivity to the cultural and personal contexts that shape them, acknowledging that what is deemed a "value" can vary significantly across different families and communities.
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Subject Terms
Family values
Family values is a broad term that refers to the traits and behaviors that are important to an individual family. It can refer to a collection of these traits and behaviors that are generally accepted and held by a community of families. For example, particular family values may be held by a specific religious group or by people of a certain nationality. These traits and behaviors are driven by a set of ethical and moral standards held by the family or community and are based on beliefs that are important to the group. The beliefs on which they are based can be religious or secular. Family values are often passed down from previous generations, although changing times can affect how subsequent generations closely adhere to established values. While many people agree that family values are important, disagreement surrounds the values themselves.
Background
Family has its roots in the Latin word famulus, which means "servant." In time, the word came to be familia and referred broadly to everyone within a household, including servants and those served. While the traditional definition of family is often thought of as two parents who are married to each other and have one or more children, many different configurations of "family" have always existed.
These can include multiple generations, either living together or separately; extended family members such as aunts, uncles, and cousins; families with adopted or foster children; blended families in which each parent brings children from a previous relationship into a new one; and families formed by people who live in close association without any legal or blood connection. Family members can live together or separated by thousands of miles and still share the same family values. These values are often based on shared experiences and the traditions and beliefs considered important by family members.
The word value comes from the Latin word valere, which means "worth." In this context, it refers to a principle, moral code, and system of ethics and behaviors that are based on something that is important to the people who hold the value. Some values include working hard, being honest, practicing discipline, adhering to a religious faith, and respecting elders.
Overview
Defining family values is complicated because people often apply the term to represent one set of standards for everyone. This is often the case with politicians and sometimes the news media, who report in broad terms about a candidate's family values or lack thereof or report how a news event reflects the public's attitude toward family values. In reality, those who hold similar values may not hold all values in common, and those who share the same values may put different priorities on following through on those values.
For example, in a three-generation household with grandparents, parents, and children all living together in one home, the grandparents may think that work ethic is of primary importance and endorse the children having a long list of chores. The parents may recognize the importance of a work ethic but see devotion to athletic practices as an alternate way to foster the sense of responsibility and pride of accomplishment that are part of work ethic. Either way, the children are likely to absorb the idea that working hard at something is very important to their family.
Values are not taught as much as they are caught, which means parents should lead by example to teach their children. As in the last example, it is often not as much what is said about a behavior that influences how it is retained by the members of the family but how they see family members behaving related to that value. If honesty is considered a family value, but members of the family cheat on their taxes or call off sick from work to go to the movies, it is not likely that honesty will truly be adopted as a family value. On the other hand, if a parent goes back to a store to pay for an item that they were accidentally not charged for, then their children will see this act of honesty and understand that it is important in their family.
Family values are important because they enhance the sense of unity and belonging in the family. The values that a family holds determine how family members spend their time and money; how they act toward one other and other people; and sometimes how they dress and what they eat. Values provide guidance for how to handle situations in life, how to make good decisions and form healthy relationships, and how to behave when encountering new circumstances. For example, one of the children who saw a parent pay for an overlooked item will have a firm basis for deciding what to do if he or she is with a friend who attempts to shoplift an item from a store.
Conversely, issues can arise if people forget or choose to ignore that different families can have different values. This can especially be a problem when the values are tied to deeply held cultural or religious beliefs. In some cases, certain behaviors or ways of living are categorized as wrong or improper because they "go against family values." In the past, divorce, single-parent households, legalized drinking and gambling, and women holding jobs outside the home were all classified as being in opposition to family values. In the twenty-first century, some people may see same-sex relationships, people who undergo gender reassignment surgery, or those who favor allowing abortion as going against family values.
Social psychologists note that the problems associated with the concept of family values result from the assumption that private values should govern all public behavior. Even when many people may hold similar values—such as a belief in protecting the innocence of childhood and providing quality education to all children—they may differ on how to achieve this. This can lead to conflict. Issues also may arise when family values are negative. For example, a family that believes their way of life is superior to others may pass along values that reflect prejudice and discrimination.
Younger family members who choose to differentiate their values from those of their parents are sometimes called "cycle breakers" or refer to the conscious act of instilling different values in their children as "breaking the cycle." These individuals often focus on the aforementioned negative values that can result in prejudice and discrimination or certain values that may be unattainable or unnecessary, such as earning perfect grades in school or being the best player on a sports team. While these values can seem positive on the surface, cycle breakers have likely been forced to over-extend themselves in order to achieve such outcomes or felt guilt or shame for not achieving them. Overtime, such pressure can result in trauma, and thus cycle breakers want to avoid such negative experiences for their children. Some cycle breakers may also be against the way values were enforced by their parents, such as physical punishment, guilt, or shame. They recognize alternative, positive approaches to instilling values that avoid physical or mental harm to their children.
Bibliography
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